Vrydag Byskrifte

Ek is maar stil vandag en deel darem so ou grappie om jou dag op te kikker:

Onnie in die Engelse klas: “Jannie, wat is die Afrikaanse woord vir fan belt”

Jannie: “Bewonderaarsgordel, Meneer.”

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Ampie is ‘n beesboer. Goeie mens, uit een stuk gesny. Hy het ‘n seuntjie, wat ten tye van die episode sowat drie jaar oud was. ‘n Regte klein bulletjie. Volg sy pa soos ‘n skaduwee oral op die plaas rond.

Sondag gaan hulle kerk toe. Eers vertrek Ma en Ouma met die motor. Pa en seun is nog by die beeste besig, en hulle volg later met die bakkie.

Na die diens, by die tee drinkery, vertel Ma dat sy die Mercedes se uitlaat gehaak het, en dit klink nie te goed nie. Ampie moet asb kyk of sy so kan huistoe ry. Daar langs die kerksaal, trek hy sy swart baadjie uit, en seil onder die kar in. Seuntjie agterna. Nuuskierige omstanders rondom.

Dominee: “Hoe lyk dit broer Ampie?”

Seuntjie loer onder uit: ” Die fotten ding is fattap!”

Geskokte stilte.

Dominee: “Broer Ampie?” Ampie (loer nie onder die kar uit nie): “Dominee, ek vrees die kind is reg!”

***

A plane is on its way to Melbourne when a blonde in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down.
The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde passenger that she paid for Economy and that she will have to go and sit in the back. The blonde
replies “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Melbourne and I’m staying right here!” The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the pilot and co-pilot that there is some blonde bimbo sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy and won’t move back to her seat.

The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for Economy she is only entitled to an economy place and she will have to leave and return to her original seat. The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Melbourne and I’m staying right here!” Exasperated the co-pilot tells the pilot that it was no use and that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest this blonde woman that won’t listen to reason. The pilot says, “You say she’s blonde? I’ll handle this, I’m married to a blonde, and
I speak blonde!” He goes back to the blonde, whispers in her ear, and she says “Oh, I’m sorry – I had no idea,” gets up and moves back to her seat in the economy section.

The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and asked him what he said to make her move without any fuss. The Pilot replied “I told her First Class isn’t going to Melbourne”.

***

Baie dankie vir jou inloer/deelneem. Ek hoop jy het ‘n heerlike naweek!

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